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[jesterlies]

Clown Contact Coming Soon

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continuation

[purevanillacookie]

[ He can't help the laugh, both outloud and in his head, as Shadow Milk damns him and presses in harder. Oh that backfires a little on Vanilla, actually. Cause now he's pressing against him and they are the same height, and Vanilla is glad his robes are thick and voluminous. ]

Shhh, I would truly not leave you.

[ He moves their laced hands down between them, pulling his palm from Shadow Milks so he can press it up against the line of Shadow Milks arousal. Pulls the other tighter against him with the arm around his waist.

And roughly strokes his palm along him, letting his mouth move to Shadow Milks ear, to touch the lobe with his lips. ]

If we're connected and you claim I'm yours, does that mean you're mine?

[jesterlies]

[He frees his hand, but it searches frantically for some other part of his other half to hold onto. As if he'd simply perish if the contact stayed lost for too long.]

[At this rate, he might.]

[Pure Vanilla's hand on his arousal makes his vision go bright, sparks dancing in his mind like fireworks, and the sound that climbs out of him is obscene, thick from his already frayed vocal cords. There is liquid fire under his skin, and former Fount of Knowledge simply does not have a name for this feeling. He scarcely has a thought at all. To be reduced to such a state so easily, to be at the mercy of this body so entirely as he simply hands Pure Vanilla any vestige of control he might yet still have should make him utterly insane and yet-]

Aaa-am I? Ss- Show me...! Prove it-

[Is it not the sweetest sound? To have the Beast of Deceit completely at the mercy of your hand, Pure Vanilla?]

just to be safe

[purevanillacookie]

[ And like last time, Pure Vanilla is waiting for him. But unlike last time when Shadow Milk may have found the echo of his own Deceit, there's warmth and compassion and acceptance. Vanilla folds Shadow Milk carefully into him, past what the Jam offers, into the very core of himself.

And this time its the Truth, Vanillas sweet reassurance that the connection won't be broken. Brilliant and offering everything; his power, his thoughts, everything he knows and is.

His voice hums around him, as Vanilla mingles their souls again, touching that lonely ache in Shadow Milk to ease it away. ]

As one again...

opens arms

[jesterlies]

[He loses himself for a blissful eternity, letting his soul fall right into Vanilla's arms. In a brief almost destructive moment, he did not care what the other did with it, so long as it was his will.]

[He forsake Truth all on his own, but even so, as the corruption and madness ate away at him, Truth had been there hiding in his shadows, threatening to seep through- up until the Witches tore it away from him, locking him away with only half of who he was. He gave himself to Deceit and tried to fill a void, but it could never be complete. Truth has welcomed him back and he feels that chasm within him yearn to be filled once again.]

[It goes both ways of course, Shadow Milk opens himself up, gives himself entirely over to it, and thus hands Vanilla everything that he is. All the good and the bad, all the pain, the loneliness, the madness and corruption that still seems to seep off of him like a stubborn miasma- that has gotten noticeably better as time goes on.]

[The flashes of who he once was, of who Knowledge had been.]

I'll never let you go.

[It sounds like a threat, but it isn't. It's anguished and relieved, and thousands of years overdue.]

spamming up your inbox

[purevanillacookie]

[ Time is wobbly who knows when this occurs, but Pure Vanilla isn't going to let Shadow Milk go some nights. Sometimes he will head back to his house, to Cacao and Lily, and remain connected with Shadow Milk through their soul jam connection.

And sometimes a night is particularly long and he has texts and symbols dancing behind his eyelids, and all he wants to do is curl up on the bed in Shadow Milks room, pull the blueberry down against him, and curl up to sleep there.

It's one of those nights when it first happens. Vanilla curled against Shadow Milks back, arms tucked around him, knees fitting into the back of his and his mouth slightly open against his shoulder as he drifts in and out of sleep. It's still something that doesn't come easy to him, and this night is particularly difficult. He claws for something to aid him, to stop his mind, and he reaches up to lay his palm against Shadow Milks chest, over his heart. And when he eventually does? He's not entirely sure what happens that makes him slip past sleep and into... something else.

It feels like a memory when he opens his eyes, not unlike wading through the brand, but it's far more. And the location is... familiar, in a sense of unfamiliarity. The coloring of gold and white, his own colors (but not, not here) and... it feels like the Academy. But a portion of the Academy he's never been. The Tower?

It feels like coming home and he stands there for a moment to merely admire the location, smiling softly as he tilts his head to look upwards. It's lovely. But where is he? ]

Hello?

slaps inbox this thing can fit so much shadownilla

[jesterlies]

[It's similar to the Academy in a lot of ways, but there is something loftier about it. As if they were among the stars themselves. The shimmer of stars cradled in a milky evening sky lights up the ceilings of the halls, and the floors are a reflective, but beautiful marbled candy. Pristine sugar columns with familiar milk droplet crowns. Perhaps if Vanilla listened closely, the whispering of Truth will tell him he is in The Spire, but not as he knows it.]

[This is the Spire of Knowledge, and it is ...almost deafeningly quiet as Pure Vanilla walks along. At least until he comes to an ornate carved door with a familiar Soul Jam carved into it. It's been cracked just a bit open, and a soft lamp light filters out.]

...Hello?

[Someone responds. The voice is ...familiar? Maybe?]

Is someone there?

[purevanillacookie]

[ Is it telling the first place Pure Vanilla looks now when he's trying to find Shadow Milk is his own clothing? Or his shadow for little eyes peeking back at him? ]

Bluebird, are you busy?

[jesterlies]

[Hello, Vanilla, your shadow suddenly decided to wave at you. He's correct! A bunch of blue eyes just blink open for a moment before he climbs out of it partially so that he can prop his chin up with his hand, elbow against the floor while his low half continues being in the nebulous void of the shadow.]

You raaaaaang?

portal landing

[purevanillacookie]

[ And look at that, Zahliya said the portal was on target, so there's Loop and Pure Vanilla stepping out into Shadow Milks room. Loop will promptly make a run for it, with Vanilla promising to be right behind, but the moment he's gone, he turns to Shadow Milk, beaming. ]

Perfectly timed!

[ As if they weren't just in a situation that had quickly gotten Oopsie Boss Fight worthy. ]

[jesterlies]

[Loop runs, and that's fine. Shadow Milk does not spare them much mind. He is instead, intent on Vanilla who comes out the portal beaming like nothing is wrong.]

[Shadow Milk surges forward to grip Vanilla by the front of his robes.]

Perfectly timed my icing! What happened!

[He's not worried, you're worried, piss off-]

before mushies...

[lilyberation]

( at some point between the sensory hell that is neo-eden and the monster madness, lily... makes some changes. if shadow milk cookie is home, he'll hear heimr enter, his heavy steps alongside lily's lighter ones, and then feel the thrum of magic. words are exchanged, and then... silence, until lily knocks on his door. )

[jesterlies]

[There are various hooks around the house that used to be for Pure Vanilla’s staff, and it’s perhaps almost poetic they still retain use. Shadow Milk sits in his room with some fabric and thread, stitching away at some project when his ears flick up, tilts to the new sound. Hm, those foot steps he doesn’t immediately recognize. Very few people walk that heavy that tends to frequent the house.]

[He’s already heading to the door when Lily comes knocking, that thrum of magic making him curious.]

What was that?

after night vale

[lilyberation]

( at some point, lily knocks on the door of the atelier, a little box in her hands. ydalir tied it with a bow and everything... )

Shadow Milk Cookie? Can we talk?

[jesterlies]

[He hopes they never see that weird place again. Ugh, why are all the weird towns this place drops them in so annoying. He's making some kind of doll when she knocks that he hastily shoves in a drawer when she knocks.]

We can always talk, but I can't guarantee you'll like what you hear, though, Guardian!

[Hahaha, wait, why does she sound so serious is he in trouble?]

POST-DREAM

[wolfetracks]

( there's a lot he doesn't understand. but he knows what he saw when the flower in town finally wilted, everyone was okay. everyone except...

...

they all saw her body dissipate, so she must be in the garden. nene should have confirmed it for the household, too. it still must be hard, though.

he doesn't expect to be let in, but sidney knocks on the door with his free hand. the other holds a basket, loaded with easy-to-eat foods that require no prep for shadow milk and his boy.

all he can do is wait. )

[jesterlies]

[He was fine. He made it seem like he was fine when it was all said and done. He'd made the decision to do this, it was with his hands he took her life, so that they could end this nightmare.]

[He did it. Everything had been his doing, his strings, his machinations. All him.]

[So that's why he did not show anything but his usual mask to the others before leaving. Nothing but the prideful Puppet Master who did what had to be done. It wasn't until he got back that he realized he was shaking.]

[Why does grief follow him like a shadow? Even now?]

[He almost doesn't answer the door, but thinking it might be news about her drags him to his feet. He takes his staff off the wall to open the door.]

...Oh, it's you.

[Mildly confused, but not hostile.]

After PV arrives

[lovelyredthread]

[ He's not particularly scared, but perhaps a little cautious as he approaches his father. He saw the screaming, the tantrum, the emotion... he wouldn't be surprised if Shadow Milk hadn't noticed him though, since he made himself scarce. Not his business how his father wanted to settle things with his soulmate.

But he does care about the aftermath. He does care about the turmoil this leaves, against his better judgement. It's achingly familiar to the explosive farewell Hollyberry got. He can only imagine how catastrophic it'd be if his father had his full power.

...

He enters, his little shoes tapping the hardwood to announce his presence. He's not sure exactly what his dad is feeling. Maybe he was a mix of things too. Either way, he wrapped his arms around him and sighed. ]

How're you doing?

[ Because asking if he's okay would be stupid. ]

[jesterlies]

[Shadow Milk is in the atelier for once. Though he has spent a lot of time in the Hall, he's feeling possessive of the house. He is the one that lives here now, and so he refuses to feel like he should leave. He was allowed in and everyone will regret that choice.]

[Though, he has couped himself up in here since Vanilla's return. He has emotions he doesn't know how to vent, and feelings that feel terrible and violent. He's trying to work it out of him by making something. He isn't sure if its helping or not, but hand stitching this robe is giving his hands something to do, he guesses.]

[He hears Pavlova's footsteps, ear flicking just a bit. He pauses in this stitch as he comes up behind him. The contact almost makes him jump, but he manages to sooth somewhat. He lets out a sigh. Doesn't yet trust his hands anywhere but on the arms of the chair for now.]

Why don't we play a game, Cherub? Can you tell if it's Truth or Deceit?

[The fabric he's working with is white, shiny, trimmed in gold.]

I'm right as rain, of course. As if I could be anything else.

There is a strange man in your library

[lovelyredthread]

[ The blond man has mostly been sweeping through the rooms of the Research hall like he owned the place. He's a quieter presence for one of the ghosts, easy to miss if not paying attention. It's rare that he goes far from the grounds, seemingly curious about what's become of it.

It's mostly by chance that he ends up in the same room as Shadow Milk today, having been looking at all of the new additions to the library, but the curiosity does seem to extend to Shadow Milk when he notices him. ]

Cookies... I can't say I expected that

[ It's good natured, amused if anything. Who would have expected to be reincarnated as a cookie? Let alone what would happen in their new lives as cookies. ]

Oh right, Kallias is my name. Professor Maverick's assistant of sorts.

there he is!

[jesterlies]

[The ghosts have been everywhere and Shadow Milk has been trying to avoid wandering into a few particular ones. Ghosts are ghosts, he needs to figure out how to get that door closed without it knocking him across the Grove.]

[With a sigh, he looks up from his books, where he was floating a bit with his staff.]

[The staff hones in on the spirit and Shadow Milk tilts his head. Kallias...? Seamus' assistant, that's right, he's found documents and journal entries speaking of this person. He has wondered who they might have been, but now that he looks at him, he can't help but feel the familiarity.]

[His feet gently touch the ground.]

Yes! Well, the universe certainly has a way to keep things interesting, doesn't it? Now, how did you get tied to such a wretched fate, following that foolish professor around?

[lilyberation]

( at some point after silent salt's arrival, lily comes home.

she immediately flops on the couch almost petulantly. )

Shadow Milk Cookie? Are you home?

[jesterlies]

[No immediate response, but the shadows start to move, they will creep up along Lily until he pops his head up out of them. He looks like some fucked up sentient blanket.]

Maybe.

The Evening, Post-Ball

[yourtomb]

[The return to the Grove, at least at first, seems uneventful. Indeed, something is wrong with the sky, but Silent Salt is quickly learning that there is always something wrong with this place. If anything, it makes it more pertinent that he find Shadow Milk now, before everything can go absolutely wrong.

Even if, arguably, things will go absolutely wrong by virtue of this conversation.

It's relatively late when Silent Salt approaches the research hall. He meets the eye of any and every Beholder he passes. If Shadow Milk isn't here, he will be soon enough. It's a direct summons, after all. Curiously, though, Silent Salt is dressed in the same attire he had worn the night before. The only thing missing is his mask.

There is no armor. There is no blade. Whatever comes, he will meet without a fight.

Until Shadow Milk arrives, however, he seats himself at a table and waits. His senses remain open, waiting for the shift of knowledge, of deceit, for its blueberry scent to waft into this place. He may not be looking for a fight, but he will also not be caught unawares.]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MxXDmbIJsCM

[jesterlies]

[Congrats! You guessed correctly that Shadow Milk would be inside the Research Hall! He is, in fact, sitting at a telescope on the second floor- the area that is a personal living quarters. He does not spend a whole lot of time here usually, but sometimes when he's busy he spends the night here.]

[He noticed the moon right away and spent sometime trying to document what the fuck was going on up there. Frankly, that's a terrible fucking omen.]


[Just like the presence he just felt.]

[Hm. What is he doing here? That doesn't sit well with him, either. At this time of night?]

[Something tells him to let the man sit there, let him wait, he has more important things to be doing. But the curiosity gets the better of him. He sees him sitting there at the table now, no armor. No mask. No weapon.]

[Time to raise a particularly interesting curtain, hm? Salt will eventually get what he wants, the smell of blueberries wafting down as a door opens on the second floor. The hard click of heels against the stairs as he descends down. No sneaking up on him, no theatrics, yet.]

I don't have any night classes scheduled currently, you know.

[AFTER THE CONFESSION] cw: allusions to self harm

[lilyberation]

( the night since their return has been- unsettling. more still when shadow milk leaves for his research hall and pavlova is isolating. she'd been trying to calm herself when she'd realized the soft hum of silence that has been touching her mind for weeks now was suddenly gone. all she could think at the time was that something is wrong.

and then silent salt cookie sends his one thought forward.

tend to shadow milk.

very little spurs her into action as quickly. with an almost panicked rush, she pulls pure vanilla cookie from his room, tugging him across the grove to the research hall with no explanation-

maybe it's the winter chill, but something about the research hall feels so much colder than usual. there is a scent of blueberries in the worst ways, something she's only smelled when he's... lashing in at himself. her stomach churns, but it's the way to go. eventually however, one arm linked with pure vanilla's for stability, she calls out: )

Shadow Milk Cookie...?

[ancientlight]

( Pure Vanilla knows. If White Lily is in a panic, it's nothing to take lightly. If he's grateful for anything at this moment, it's the fact that he's here to confront anything that she needs help with. Though, it's only moments later when he feels it in his souljam -- something is wrong. Realization hits him, and he only begins to walk all the more quickly.

He won't stop her from leading the way, merely squeezing her hand in reassurance. In that moment, words aren't needed.

The scent of blueberries reaches him, and his lips press together into a thin line. What happened? What was alarming him so? Perhaps it involved Pavlova? Pure Vanilla hasn't failed to notice his sudden absence. He remains close to White Lily's side as they walk further into the research hall together. )

Please, Shadow Milk Cookie. Whatever is the matter, we are both here to help...

After EF's Death

[yourtomb]

[Silent Salt's knock upon the Inn's doors is nothing near polite. It is a forceful thing, barely restrained for the sake of not damaging the one thing standing between the monsters chittering behind the Beast and the citizens of the village. It takes everything in Salt's power not to tear it down himself, solely as an exercise in exertion. He had thought he had done enough, hacking at the trees of the forest. But now rage and despair sit within the hollow of his throat, churning and desperate to be let out.

He has not felt like this since he learned of his assumed betrayal. Not since he watched his own people turn against his beloved knights. Not since the barren fell silent forever more.

He wishes he could do more. Nothing productive, mind you. He would rather carve endless ruts into the earth, forever marring the land with his grief. At least it would be something, rather than swallowing it all and trudging back with his shame.

He had failed. They would all know it.

But even if he had been ignoring her, he still had a duty to White Lily. He could not abandon her. Especially when she would already be devastated by news of Elder Faerie's passing.

Unfortunately, though, he knows what his return means, just as he knows he has likely been watched since the moment he decided to ask Shadow Milk for help. What a fool he was, using his own name as a code. Solidarity feels like even more of a curse than usual.

But he waits, the name burning on his tongue. He wants to spit it out and be done with.]

[jesterlies]

[He waits, with a book, mind, but he waits for Salts "valiant" return. He could have just wandered off and left him at the door, of course. He thought about it for a moment or two, really had the debate with him about how much of this he wanted to be involved in.]

[He helped him find that Fool, and the deed was done, there was no need to continue meddling.]

[Yet he waited in the lobby anyway, for that telltale knock. Yes, that sort of brutish pounding on the door sounds about right, so he rises and slowly makes his way over. It's not just for his own satisfaction that he took his time to the door, but rather now that he has no means to keep himself afloat, his already regrettably frail body is just not used to all this movement. It's begun wearing on him and its only a few days into this mess.]

Password.

january, once they're both at the inn because idk how he's getting there-

[lilyberation]

( the moment she sees him in the inn, she forgets everything else. she'd been setting up a room on the first floor forthe hatchlings to claim, rusty had been following her like a diligent guard dog while marble and eden rested by the fireplace, but- well.

shadow milk.

she dashes to him, pulls him into a tight hug- )

Shadow Milk! You aren't hurt, are you?

Yeah me either, maybe his ass was at the research hall when all hell broke loose.

[jesterlies]

[He's been pacing around, unable to sit still. He was driven straight out of the Research Hall by those things, and he found quickly he had no magic, nothing to defend himself. He'd run with all he had, and he hates to say he almost didn't make it in. The Inn was closest, but he'd been fretting, worrying about the house.]

[He couldn't reach out with telepathy, and he was close to writing a message in the notebook when suddenly her voice rings out.]

Lily!

[Yeah he is grabbing her and pulling her in. Oh god, so that's everyone accounted for, right? Right.]

[...His telepathy isn't working. He pulls away just a moment so he can sign her.]

I'm fine, what about you?